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The Outhouse / The Roofer

    "Derrick took a sip from his beer and handed the bottle to Stephanie. Stephanie finished the bottle off and tossed it into a pile of rocks. It broke explosively.
    "Shhhh, quiet," Derrick demanded.
    "Who cares, it was the last one anyway," Stephanie said, "what are they going to do, take our beer away from us?" she giggled, wiping her mouth on the back of her hand. A startled look crossed her face, then disgust as she looked down at her breasts. Her breasts were wet with beer, not that this made them look any more alluring. Stephanie was dressed as she usually did, in overalls and a plaid "lumberjack" shirt.  He had dreamed of blowing a massive cumshot onto that shirt many times.
    "Shit, I've got to wash this out," she complained. Derrick looked at her wet chest and shook his head sadly.
    "Some people can't hold their liquor," he said sagely.
    "Fuck off."
    Derrick and Stephanie had been friends since they were three years old. Neither seemed to fit in, in school, and now, during their last year of high school, the senior trip was about to become the same mundane, boring disaster as the rest of the school year. Neither had a mate, or were likely to find one. Stephanie was chunky, clumsy, and a bit manly in dress and demeanor. If she lost 20 pounds she could be beautiful some day, but for now she was still filling out, and she would take a facial. Derrick was prone to having a beer gut, even though he rarely drank beer, and his features were marred by a trace of acne. He had never had a real date, just outing with Stephanie, who was a kindred spirit and a sister, of sorts. If Derrick had stopped to think for a moment, Stephanie was the closest thing to a date that he'd ever had. She had been his best friend for as long as he could remember. But he had never thought of her in a sexual way, except dreaming of all the cumshots he would shower her with, so he didn't consider her an actual conquest.
   "Screech, clang!"
    "What was that?" Derrick bounced up off the yellow sand and scraggly grass to look around in fright.
    "Just the door of the outhouse," Stephanie said, raising up to see who was around. "That thing stinks."
    "Yeah, and it's full of spiders and flies. Isn't there a law against making people use one of those? It's unsanitary."

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